13 March 2014

Good, bad, and In Between

I was talking about divorce on my Facebook the other day. I've noticed a lot of people post that they're separating and going through a divorce. 

First, I know how you feel. I've been divorced for a little over a year. I was married for 4 years and luckily we never had children. I don't regret being married because regret is useless. You can't change anything, so don't dwell on it. 

Second, when I thought about divorce. It reminded me of my parent's divorce and why it happened. Most of you don't know much about this because I've never told you. 

My parents divorced when I was in elementary school. Perhaps around 3rd or 4th grade or even in between that time. I'm not sure exactly. If any of you reading this went to elementary school with me then you may remember that when I was in 3rd grade, I wore a stocking hat most of the year to cover my bald head. Perhaps you thought I was sick with something. I doubt I ever explained it. The bald head? I went to the doctor because my hair had been falling out. The doctor said it was because of stress. My dad's solution? Shave my head! 

It was his fault that my hair was falling out! How could he do that to a little girl?! Do you know how embarrassed I was at school with no hair? Did you know that kids made fun of me?! 

Now you're wondering, why did your dad stress you out enough to cause hair loss? Physical abuse and mental abuse. Have you ever been thrown on the floor and stepped on? Had your leg pinched so hard it left a huge bruise? Slapped in the face when you didn't do a thing? (These are just things I remember, I'm not sure if there was anything else) Living in fear of someone is not the way to live.

My mother finally got the courage and divorced my dad and I love her so much and thank her for doing that for her and for us (Joseph and I). 

I don't even consider that man my father, even though he has asked for my forgiveness. I refuse. Although, I do have a couple of half sisters that I am friends with and hope to get to know better in the future. 

This post was definitely a little of the good, the bad, and the in between.

Love always,

Melissa

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