Meetup.com

So, yesterday I did something very out of the ordinary. I met up with a meetup group from meetup.com. 

I'd been on the site all summer, but none of the groups interested me enough to make me want to go see what any of it was about. This week, I got on my app and saw that a fairly new group had been made. It was a 20s-30s social group. Just a hang out, have fun, meet people my age thing. So, I decided it was time to try something new. I was nervous, but with a little encouragement from the organizer and another new member like myself, I took the plunge. 

When I parked across from the restaurant, I felt super nervous. So nervous, in fact, that my stomach was turning. If you know me, you know that meeting new people can be hard for me sometimes. Years ago in a land not so far away, I couldn't make myself talk to strangers. I've learned to not care as much anymore and can talk to strangers. 

I purposely got there early. I was the first person to meet the organizer and so after chatting a bit while we waited for others and our table, I felt a little bit easier by the time we sat down. It ended up being a really nice night out after the torrential downpour before dinner. Food, drinks, conversation. I think I've met a really cool group of people. 

Love Always,

Melissa

Music Heals

So many times I've turned to music to help me through something. Anger, sadness, happiness, etc. 

I love music. I listen to just about anything under the sun. Certain songs remind me of certain memories. It just helps.

Sometimes when a familiar song comes on you can see my mood change or that I've "gone" somewhere else into a memory that is forever engrained in my mind. 

A lot of people have different ways of healing. Mine is music. What's yours? What helps you get through the day? 

Love Always, 

Melissa

Epiphany

So, 21 months I've been divorced. The thing I've had the most problem with since has been, being alone. 

I know that I have friends and family. I love them dearly. So, don't think that I don't know know you guys are here for me. 

I've battled some demons in the last year. I thought I was fine. First, I was sad. Then, angry and then I tried dating again. I've met some cool friends from it, but I also met rejection. 

Sometimes causing me to go into a depressive state for a week or two. I had my friends to snap me out of it. For a while I was okay. Then, one of my best friends moved and for some reason I couldn't cope. The winter was terrible as well and so I sunk into another depression. This one lasted for a couple months this time. 

Either people didn't notice or they chose to ignore it. I couldn't stand being alone and so I talked to whoever and ignored their red flags that I normally look out for. Until friends talked sense into me again. 

I don't talk to the red flaggers anymore. 

I've discovered this weekend that I'm truly okay. I can be alone. I went to the Farmer's Market on Saturday and I also spent Sunday afternoon reading. 21 months. It took that long to realize that being alone is okay and that I'll be okay.  

Love Always,

Melissa