I know that I have friends and family. I love them dearly. So, don't think that I don't know know you guys are here for me.
I've battled some demons in the last year. I thought I was fine. First, I was sad. Then, angry and then I tried dating again. I've met some cool friends from it, but I also met rejection.
Sometimes causing me to go into a depressive state for a week or two. I had my friends to snap me out of it. For a while I was okay. Then, one of my best friends moved and for some reason I couldn't cope. The winter was terrible as well and so I sunk into another depression. This one lasted for a couple months this time.
Either people didn't notice or they chose to ignore it. I couldn't stand being alone and so I talked to whoever and ignored their red flags that I normally look out for. Until friends talked sense into me again.
I don't talk to the red flaggers anymore.
I've discovered this weekend that I'm truly okay. I can be alone. I went to the Farmer's Market on Saturday and I also spent Sunday afternoon reading. 21 months. It took that long to realize that being alone is okay and that I'll be okay.
Love Always,
Melissa
2 comments:
Sorry to hear you've been going through that and I'm glad you've been able to find a position that works for you. I've had plenty of friends that were 'serial daters' and always felt the need to be with someone in order to feel like that's what they're supposed to do and need. They then went on a sort of personal therapy mission where they stopped dating, stopped looking for dates and not worrying about finding a future partner. Most have been successful and realized that their priority has always been to work on themselves and figure out what truly makes them happy, before trying to make other people happy and love them back. I say 21 months is a good start, keep it going. You're going to thank yourself later. Love you!
-Melinda
Time's are hard when you lose a part of yourself that you had put time and effort to. Time is the only thing that can help, friends and family are your boost. When and if you feel down, just remember. Your will is strong, your heart keeps beating for a reason and it's not to give up or think little about yourself. If you need to talk, talk to your friends or family that you know that will listen. It helps to share. Helps ease the weight you carry in your heart and mind. :)
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